In celebration of Kai finishing his 4th Trimester I wanted to share my Top Ten Things I’ve learned since becoming a babymama.
1. Change is constantly coming.
Once you figure something out, enjoy it because the next hurdle is on it’s way.
2. Be open. I was anti co sleeping before Kai was born. Personally, I didn’t think it was safe. I know a lot of people who do it and do it well but I wasn’t comfortable with it. I also wasn’t into a family bed where it’s a free for all where 6 year olds are still wedged in between my husband and me. So when Sean casually mentioned he could sleep downstairs because “What’s the point of both of us being tired?” I thought what a weird idea but lit up when he mentioned he could help more by taking the baby in the morning for a few hours so I could sleep. That got my attention and my vote. That night I pulled Kai out of his bassinet next to my bed and moved him into his snuggle nest right in the middle of my bed. I loved having him so close especially for the night feedings. I got to the point where I could change his diaper, feed him and put him down in 20min. I could also push that darn sleep sheep button very easily every 45min. This went well for a few weeks and then we went to New York.
3. “Soft” is the one word I’d use to describe my new babymama body. My body looks completely different to me even though I’m close to my pre baby weight. I’m not complaining-I’m just sayin… I’m sure continuing to teach my spin class will help but “Soft” is what it is.
4. Breastfeeding is a sport! Ahhh, so interesting to get what you want and much much more. I wanted to breastfeed exclusively for 6 months to 1 year and didn’t want Kai to have nipple confusion. We are breastfeeding 8-12 times a day and there is NO nipple confusion what so ever. After my husband saw that babies at the hospital in the nursery were given pacifiers at night I put a note on his bed to NOT give him a pacifier. I waited the suggested time of 4-6weeks before introducing the bottle. Now, Kai wants nothing to do with the bottle or the pacifier. And my milk supply is so well established that I pump an extra 10-12 ounces a day to take the edge off. I’m officially a milkmaid and human pacifier. Good news is that I have a freezer full of breast milk and a well fed baby!
5. The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD changed my life. Our friend Jen Leo gave me this book right after Kai was born. I read it and practiced the 5′s. But I didn’t get aggressive with the swaddling and sshhhhhing until my Lily’s mom gave me the DVD. I’m visual like that. Once I saw Harvey Karp wrap that baby as tight as a mummy and sssshhh as loud as vacumm cleaner, I stepped it up a notch.
6. Add at least 30 min to everything you do to get there on time. You’ll either be a few minutes early or right on time.
7. Sex only gets better and better. Get naked and keep trying.
8. Baby gear makes your life easier. Of course it’s possible to forgo all the baby carriers, BOB strollers and swings but why? So handy, especially when you travel. I’m constantly reminding myself that when we’re traveling I’ve got to be flexible with Kai. Like Colleen from TravelMamas says let them nap in the Ergo when on the go. I couldn’t agree more.
9. Be patient and realistic. Wow, I wish I could tape these two words to my forehead. It’s hard to remember when you’re a new mommy to be patient and realistic. But I’ll keep trying.
I used to workout everyday and “do” a lot in one day. Now, I’m happy working out when I can (few times a week) and “doing” 1 or 2 things a day. Sometimes, it takes all morning just to get going let alone do a load of laundry. So, I try and remind myself that 1 big adventure a day even if it’s going grocery shopping is a victory.
10. I really do have The Glory Job! It was 5am and Kai was about 7weeks old when Sean popped upstairs to check on us. He flopped onto the bed and exclaimed how tired he was… Let’s just say I’m not the sweetest person at 5am but am really far from sweet after being up all night breastfeeding. I growled “How can you be tired after getting a chunk of sleep downstairs?” Then he proceeded to tell me I have “The Glory Job.” As tired as I was, it sure didn’t feel glorious. I didn’t say a word.
Today, I totally agree that I have “The Glory Job” taking care of baby Kai. He is the sweetest little thing in the whole wide world! But it’s not 5am and we’re not breastfeeding 12/day anymore.
10 Comments
SO agree with EVERYTHING on your list. It is funny how you go in with all the expectations and plans, and then the baby arrives…..and your entire game plan changes. Keep up the good work and I will try my hardest to remember all of these wonderful things when Baby No. 2 arrives in 6 weeks!
Definitely sounds like you are enjoying and learning.
Lots of what you say is good life advice.
Also, remember you can’t slow it down so enjoy, before you know it the kids will be out of the house. You look great!
David
#6 – Spot on!! It’s so true, and it doesn’t get any easier as the baby gets older. My daughter now is 17 months old and I still have to remind myself to allow enough time to get here or go there….
With Oscar only a few months behind Kai we can actually put your freshly hatched pearls of wisdom into action right away. 1st stop – that baby dvd you mentioned.
Oh yeah, swaddling… Initially I swaddled Oscar tighter than Hector’s carne asada burritos at Santa Cruz, but then Oscar started kicking his way out. I thought this meant he was hot or felt too constricted. WRONG. I’m re-swaddling again now during his 6-7 week fussy phase and even in the 95 degree heat, it seems to chill him out.
Brandy….this is so great! Wonderful advice and such a fantastic way to look at things. You are doing such an awesome job. He looks so precious and so well loved. What a sweet smile! I am so glad you are taking in each glorious step and trying to really enjoy it because as David said above, it all goes WAY too quickly!
First off, I love you to pieces and you are a GREAT mama. Secondly…. soft? I doubt it. May feel that way but all of our bodies are very different & I’ll never forget how I felt the first time I busted out some downward dog w my flopsy new belly spilling out over my already hitched up yoga pants. The humbling only continues, the other day Arista said to me “Mama, your roots used to only be this big(shows with fingers about 1/4 in) but now they’re REALLY bad!!!” (2in in finger measurements) However, watching her go off the slide & swim to the edge all by herself @ Creston Pool on Monday made me tear up a little in the deep end. It only gets better, I swear. Good Job, sissy!!!!!
The glory job. lol. Love it. I love all your little tidbits and the pictures are great. Keep that open mind girl, it’s going to come in real handy. I love your blog so much.
Thanks David! I’m having a ball and learning like crazy with Kai. He keeps me on my toes all day long.
Glad you reminded me to enjoy it bc it flys by. I’m starting to see that as we get close to 4months with our little bundle of joy. Woohoo!
Thanks Pam and Tiff for commenting!
Pam-What a whirlwind these last 3 months have been. Thank god, I’ve got this blog to remember stuff.
Tiz-You are hilarious! You had me at “hitched up!” OMG, thank you for the giggle. And in all honesty “soft” is very true. Like my running mama friends say “the weight on the scale may be similar but “the naked” is totally different. Giggle giggle. I love you and wanna see Arista strut her stuff at the pool! It seems like yesterday that I was running & pushing Arista up Thurman in her baby jogger. Only did it twice but remember it very clearly.
Stevie-6 weeks until Baby #2-Holy Moly that is exciting!
Didrik-Once Oscar busts out of the tightest swaddle you can muscle-buy the Velcro swaddle jackets.
Mom-Thanks for reading and commenting! Hard to believe you did this 3 times with cute hair and perfect mascara everyday. Sometimes at the end of the day, I wonder “Did I brush my teeth today?” You are an inspiration pretty lady!